Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Mixed emotions

Late last week I got an official looking envelope from the Phoenixville Area School District ... full of kindergarten registration information. Over the past year I thought that I would be excited to get this packet, but when it arrived and I opened and looked it over, I have to admit ... it made me sad! That surprised me. In some ways I have been so ready for Audrey to begin school. I know she is ready in every way to be a kindergartener - mentally, emotionally, physically, etc. - she will actually turn six on the day before school begins next fall! - but I guess for me it just signifies a large loss of "control" over her life. She will be spending increasing time away from home. She will be riding a bus. She will be in an environment that may not always support our beliefs. She will play with kids that I don't know, and whose parents I don't know. She won't be able to just go away to the shore in September like we've been doing for the last couple years. Again, these things are not bad, per se, but it just reminds me that my little girl is becoming a BIG girl. That she will need me less and less. That she will rely on herself more and more.

And with that comes mixed emotions for this mommy.


Chris Ann Schultz said...

Thanks for the reminder. Hope your year of transition is easier than mine was. I was so ready for Chantel to start school, Ralph and I spent the first day of school, off together.
I didn't have as much time off as I would have liked. Chantel had a lot of sick days, plus a funeral to attend the 2nd day of school.
Just ask me how stressed I was as a teacher and a parent, when I heard a suggestion from a 1st year teacher that she needs a conference next week. Luckily, Ralph will be there to calm me down. What academic concerns, when Chantel can sound out huge words already. I wasn't able to read at her age and I was a 1st grader, starting school too young, wasn't good for me.
Be glad Audrey had some time to mature, her teachers will appreciate that too!
Chantel loves school and I'm happy for her. Just watch out for the independence attitude, dealt with that tonight at dinner. (Not wanting to be told what to do.) Good luck with that! :-) Chantel reminds me of myself, bang head here! :-)
Hope your year goes well and I'm sure it will.

nateandkatesmom said...

I know exactly how you feel! I had anxiety the minute I got that packet for Nathan. It wasn't so bad this week when I got Kaitlyns. You do feel that loss of control. I hated not knowing what exactly they did in school. I don't know about Audrey....but it's like pulling teeth to get Nathan to tell me about his day. In preschool, they came out and told us what they worked on, what books they read, what games they played, etc. You don't get a daily report in kindergarten.
At least the 3 girls in the neighborhood will go together so that should make it easier for for us, we'll just have to console eachother!

ErinOrtlund said...

Oh, I can relate! But I guess it feels like less of a big deal because it's just down the road and only in the mornings. Will Audrey go for a full day? Amazing how our girls are growing up!

Anonymous said...

I hear you! What an experience...this mothering thing...our hearts, living on the outside of our wonderful, so sweet, so sad!!! BLAH!!! I love it! I hate it! :)Allison